From Addis to Sydney

I didn't say I was in Australia. I'm in Australia, have been here for a couple days now, hence the posting on the blog thing. Internet was abominable in Ethiopia; it took me six minutes to load my Gmail inbox in basic HTML mode, and that was when internet was actually working. Blogspot was blocked there, and incidentally, the government also blocked Skype, which they apparently see as a threat to their monopoly on telecommunications (this isn't unique to Ethiopia; I met two journalists from Abu Dhabi in the UAE who said Blogspot and Skype were also blocked there... only they had fast internet connections).

The Ethiopians wouldn't let me go without one final waltz at the airport. We had a power cut at Addis Ababa airport, which I suppose is entirely normal given the frequent power cuts, but you'd think they would at least have a decent generator for the airport. The security guy at the gate took my wallet, rifling through my bills to see how much money I had, and then declaring that I was taking too much Ethiopian money (about $12 USD) out of the country. Capital flight is a very scary thing for an impoverished country, and he asked why I hadn't changed my money at the bank. I told him I would gladly change my money, if there were a bank, but for whatever reason there was no bank at the departure gates.

Actually, I could have changed my money with the sketchy waiter at the airport cafe who offered to give me bad black market exchange rates. Ethiopia overvalues its own currency at about 11.20 birr to the US dollar, whereas a "free" rate of exchange might be closer to about 15 birr. Obviously, this spells black market doom and gloom, but thanks to the large Ethiopian military state, they've shut down most black market operations. The problem is when you try to change your birr back into dollars (or other foreign currency). Reportedly, the maximum you can change is about $100 USD; the government is extremely piggish with its foreign currency, and it also realizes that if if they honor their 11.20 birr/dollar rate, they're getting screwed. In the end, I ended up donating my $12 USD in Ethiopian birr to UNICEF on the plane to Australia.

Oh, but the waltz didn't end there: the little shuttle bus that brought us to our plane took us to the wrong plane at first. So when we were allowed onto a plane, I was seriously worried that I was getting onto the wrong plane, or perhaps my bags were getting on the wrong plane. Alas, all turned out well, and I found my bags and myself in Australia.

I was expecting to come to a land filled with criminals in Australia, and contemplated extending my contract with my hired gunman in Ethiopia (more on this later). I was of course worried that his aging rifle would be no use in the lawless streets of Sydney, and would have preferred a submachine gun or an AK-47 like the other gunmen had. Surprisingly, Australia is not in fact overrun by convicts, and I found the streets surprisingly safe. Sydney actually seems like a very American city, sprawling suburbs, front lawns, big cars. I suppose the one thing that sets it apart, other than the funny accents and the fact that they drive on the wrong side of the road, is that the Aussies have somehow worked out a functioning public transportation system to navigate all the suburbs surrounding Sydney, and the city rail is fast, efficient, clean, and relatively cheap.